Finally at rest

Those of us who were around in the fall of 1998 remember the national outrage when Matthew Shepard was killed – beaten and tied to a fence in bitter cold weather and left to die. He did a few days later. This was the first time the country had been outraged by the death of a gay man.

Matthew was an active member of St. Mark’s Episcopal Church in Caspar, WY before his murder. Matthew’s funeral at St. Mark’s was well attended that year. But his ashes were not interred. Parents Dennis and Judy were understandably afraid that whatever location was chosen would be desecrated or be the focus of weird pilgrimages.

Judy Shepard became an LGBT rights activist. Her efforts were helped by Gene Robinson, the first openly gay bishop in the Episcopal Church. He has since retired. Judy asked Gene if Matthew’s ashes could be interred at the National Cathedral in Washington DC, an Episcopal church. Gene helped make it happen.

So on October 26, twenty years after Matthew’s death, his ashes will be laid to rest. There will be a public celebration of life followed by a private interment. I’m delighted to hear the National Cathedral is a place where the ashes of a gay man would be welcome.



This story has made me feel teary for a second reason. My parents’ ashes are just a few feet from where I’m typing these words. It has been more than three years since Dad died. He told me to do nothing with his ashes until after his wife died so they would be handled together. It has been more than a year since Mom died. Last fall was too busy and last spring was too muddy. I’ve started plans for the final trip and I need to finish the details. I’ll have time about a month from now.