We used to just call them layoffs

Back when I first started my corporate career recessions brought on the concern of layoffs. Then there was corporate downsizing followed by "right-sizing." Now, according to Newsweek's Periscope section (alas, no link), the term is "synergy-related head-count adjustments." Doesn't that make you feel ever so much better? Here are other rebranding efforts:

legacy assets used to be known as toxic assets
exceptional assistance = bailout
macroprudential oversight = financial regulation
advisor to the free flow of capital = Mergers and Acquisition Banker
global economic restructuring = global financial crisis
inverted buoyancy = bear market

At least we don't see an inverted buoyancy in language contortions.