Rob Tisinai of Box Turtle Bulletin considers the resignation of Brendan Eich from Mozilla and forced removal of Don Sterling from the Clippers. That prompts him to ponder: Is everyone who opposes same-sex marriage a bigot?
A commenter checks definitions and says yes. So I'll rephrase the question this way: Does everyone who opposes same-sex marriage hate us?
The answer is no. Many are following convention. Others follow guidance from their pastor or priest. They oppose same-sex marriage because they can hold two contradictory beliefs: Marriage is between a man and a woman, and The gays I know are good and decent people. When they become unable to avoid the contradiction they change their mind and support marriage equality. It is these people we are reaching and who have made our recent victories possible.
But the true bigots, or haters, won't change their mind easily and will only become more shrill.
Which brings us back to Eich and Sterling. Eich has two data points for action against us: support of Pat Buchanan a couple decades ago and support for the Calif. marriage ban in 2008 with no indication he believes differently today. Bigot? Tisinai says maybe not.
In contrast Sterling bigoted comments on race (not just blacks) and women are frequent and ongoing. Bigot? Definitely, so much so that those in a minority can't trust him and work for him only with difficulty.
Don't be quick to brand an opponent as a bigot or hater. There may not be any hate behind their words or actions. And they may soon be an ally.
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