Go on, tell us what you really mean

Leading up to the winter meeting (in Honolulu, no less) of the GOP National Committee various GOP leaders are circulating a 10 point memo that has been dubbed a Purity Pledge. These are things that GOP candidates are supposed to support. There are even provisions that if a candidate breaks with three or more points, they could be penalized through the withdrawal of party funds. My paraphrase:

1. Support smaller government budgets, taxes, and deficits by opposing bills like Obama's "Stimulus" plan.

2. Support open market health care.

3. Support market based energy reforms, not cap and trade.

4. Support workers rights by opposing the union card check.

5. Support legal immigration by opposing amnesty for illegals.

6. Support victory in Iraq and Afghanistan by supporting troop surges.

7. Support containment of Iran and North Korea.

8. Support keeping Defense of Marriage.

9. Support lives of the vulnerable by opposing health care rationing and denial and by opposing government funding of abortion.

10. Support gun ownership.

Reactions:

* Should be fun to watch. If passed we see witch hunts. If not passed the Fundies see it as proof the GOP isn't conservative enough. Lose-Lose all around.

* Interesting… gays have slipped to 8th place. We used to top the list. Not that we mind being bumped from the spotlight. The list mentions only marriage?

* Things not mentioned: 1. outright anti-abortion legislation, 2. repeal of hate-crimes legislation (and no mention of religion), 3. vouchers for parochial schools, 4. War on Drugs. These used to be GOP top issues.

* Another issued not mentioned: dealing with companies that are too big to fail -- financial services reform. Never been a top GOP issue.

* Items in the list seem self-contradictory. How do you get out of a recession without government spending so that you can have low taxes and still pay for everything? Isn't cap-and-trade market based?

* Translation:

1.We support smaller if any social spending by the government, and tax breaks for the richest few and for corporations by opposing everything Obama does, including eating balanced meals.

2. We support letting our political donors, the health insurance companies, loot the pockets of Americans and deliver no goods.

3. We support keeping our oil company patrons in the energy 'driver's seat"

4. We oppose labor unions as socialists out to pick the pockets of the hard-playing idle rich owners.

5. We support keeping brown skinned people out of America. This is a white country.

6. We support continued defense spending in two wars to keep companies like Lockheed afloat. Body counts don't count.

7. We support partial nuclear disarmament one warhead at a time by dropping them on Iran and North Korea.

8. We support homophobia; the gays are the last minority that we can kick.

9. We support womb control and the right of every poor American to die in the streets.

10. We support an armed militia of birthers and tea baggers to unleash when Glen Beck gives the word.

* The phrases that got left off:

1. … unless it involves unnecessary wars or domestic spying.

2. … because market-based systems pay us more than the government does.

3. … because our big oil financiers don’t like cap and trade.

4. … because we don’t support workers rights.

5. … unless we need them for low-wage maids or stable boys.

6. … especially since we got us into these wars by lying.

7. … since we allowed them to get nuclear weapons in the first place by doing nothing before.

8. … because way down deep we’re intolerant religious bigots (okay, on the surface too).

9. … while not supporting health care for people who need it and advocating the death penalty without trial for abortion doctors.

10. … because we like our Vice Presidents to assault people with shotguns and get away with it.

Perhaps the Dems could respond with their own 10 point plan -- like the 10 points in the Bill of Rights.